Friday, March 26, 2010

Strike, while the iron is hot!!

You can see below that I am ranked 10th in the world at the 6.66 mile distance, and apparently FIRST in the "race to be sponsored by the Last Mile Brewing Company."
And how do they thank me?
By ALLOWING me to ENTER A CONTEST to win a shirt.
What? Thanks. Really. With his readership numbers, I stand as much chance to win a shirt as I do to win the BOSTON MARATHON. Ok. Maybe I have more of a chance to win the shirt, but only maybe.
No offense to "Brain Trust (which is about 90% Lady J and 10% Jamoosh) ", but I think the percentages were skewed a bit. If my wife were truely the 90%, it would have gone something like this:

Me: "Hey, Gene suggested that we 'sponsor' him. What do you think about that? Maybe we could allow him to enter a contest where we give away a t-shirt?"
My Wife: "Allow him to enter? Allow? I think that we should GIVE him a t-shirt, find some way too smuggle, send him a sample, and then name the contest after him."
Me: "wow. what great ideas. I'll post that in my blog today, and let's get this thing kicked off over the weekend!!!"
My Wife: "I love you soooo much."
Me: "You took the words right out of my mouth." (oohhhh, it musta been while you were kissing me.....)

Instead, I am allowed to enter. Ever see "Real Genius"? Remember Lazlo, the professional student who lived in the bowels of the dorm? As the film progresses, he figures out how many times he needs to submit entries into a contest so that he can win all of the prizes. At the end, he is bummed that he only won something like 97%. Well, as soon as the rules are announced, I will channel my inner Lazlo......

Or, to give everyone else a fighting chance, Jamoosh can simply 'give' me a shirt, and I promise to wear it respectfully, and NOT use it to buff my truck.

I'm just sayin'......

Saturday, March 20, 2010

The results are in......

While it may come as a surprise, i did NOT win anything at the Global Warming, My A$$ 6.66mile Race.
It may, though, come as a TRUE surprise that I placed 10th. Out of the ENTIRE WORLD. Don't believe me? Check out the results here: Running off at the Mind. Since the race was open to ANY competitor on the planet, and all were given ample time to submit their application (email saying, "I'm in"), and the rules were clearly stated......i think it is safe to say that it was a WOLRD WIDE event. so.
10th in the WORLD it is. thank you, thank you. I expect to start receiving emails and calls from potential sponsors ANY DAY now (hint, hint). Here is my list of sponsors that I would say "yes" to in a second. No further consideration needed:

NUUN why? So i could GET SOME (nuun, that is). All i can find around here is KONA KOLA. I'm all in favor of alliteration and all that, (see?), but it just doesn't even sound good to me. And i don't feel like paying almost as much for shipping as the product costs. So, step up, NUUN.

Darn Tough Socks love, LOVE these socks. Am currently drafting a letter to see if they will send me some samples to review and then give away. (new ones, of course, NOT the ones i tried out. nasty.) Vermont company. Good folks. Nuf said.

Stonyfield Farms yogurt. I go through at least 2 tubs a week of their Organic Fat Free Plain.

Longacres Nursery for plants and such, not kids. My wife lurve, LURRRVES her some plants and mulch and stuff, and since she is already my primary sponsor, I would like to give back (and if it helps me 'get some', well....then....win win!)(not NUUN, see above). But I digress......

Where was I? Oh, right. Sponsors. Whew. Almost needed a moment there......aaaaaand I'm back.
ok.

Last Mile Brewery because you need to replace carbs. Why not use tasty ones?

And lastly, a free consultation and marathon training plan from runnerdudesfitness. The owner is a great guy, very motivated, knowledgeable, and friendly. I think that it would be great for him to expand his business to the online (world wide) runner, and I could be a great embassador....(hint, hint).

Alright, so if ANY of you have ANY pull (in my direction) with the above mentioned potential sponsors, please put in a good word for me. Many thanks......

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Global Warming my A$$ 6.66 mile race report

Oh, SNAP! I was almost done, and then remembered this is s'posed to be in the newspaper column format. Here goes:

Who: Me. Gene. Dad. Sonny Boy. Bonehead.
What: Global Warming my A$$ 6.66 mile race
When: Friday, 12MAR10
Where: Hartford and North Hartland, Vermont, Rte 5 south then north, along the 3cm wide strip of asphalt between the speeding vehicles and certain death in the ditches.
Why: "Because it's there."
How: Painfully, slowly, inch be ever-loving inch. errr...i mean....in my Adidas something or others (am i the ONLY one online who wears Adidas???), Darn Tough socks, EMS microfiber pants, GMARA.org tech shirt, and Brooks running jacket. Oh, and Under Armour hat. Garmin 305. TIME=57:32
whew, that was painful.
on with the show....
As usual (NOT "as PER" usual. man, i HATE that. per=as), i procrastinated trained VERY HARD for this race, and nailed it to the wall. Like Jell-o. Ever tried that? Ever heard that expression? (see, i can even procrastinate with a race report!)
I got to the venue right after work. I had tried to line up my diet to be conducive for an after work run, but then tragedy struck. I ate my salad for lunch, and then ate my yogurt and granola around 2pm, figuring on a nice 2 hour window between eating and running. WELL....then some techs from radiology came around and invited me down to their area to partake in some good eats from a birthday party. Luckily we were short staffed in the ICU and I couldn't leave to join them. "No problem! We'll bring you some shrimp jambalaya!!!) Tragic.
So i ate some. And then ate more. 3 small bowls later, (over the course of about an hour. gimme a break. i am NOT a Dyson. See? procrastinated AGAIN. i RULE!) where was I? oh, right. eating. again.
So now it was about 300. ut-oh. not what i bargained for, and we all know how eating too close to running can effect the run(s). If you are not sure, head on over to Beth's blog and read all about it. Luckily, Mother Nature was in my corner, and things worked out A-OK by 345. I drove to the parking area and got myself all set up with Teri (Garmin). Luckily there was ample parking nearby, and I didn't need to take the shuttle. This is a bonus, actually, because I don't do well sitting amongst strangers. Parking was here, at our new aquatic center. I know. It looks like an abandoned warehouse. Mind you, this multi-million dollar complex is a big thorn in the sides of town residents.
I am not quite sure why, but I felt compelled to take a picture of my shoes, socks, and shins. Here, for your viewing pleasure, is that picture. (Parents, please ask young children to leave the room briefly. Thank you.)
 Here is a picture of Teri before the race. Hardly seems nervous at all, does she?
I tried to take pictures during the race, but they didn't come out very good. Must have been my blistering pace that made them all blurry. The Vermont countryside isn't all that picturesque this time of year, anyway. Lots of mud, brown leaves and 'grass', bleck. There is about 3-5cm of asphalt between the white line and the edge of the pavement (budget cuts?), and then about a foot of unstable dirt between the end of the pavement and either the guardrail or a ditch. Let's just say "pucker power" and move along, shall we?
So out and back. I walked for about 20 feet at the 3.5 mile mark, and then again at about 5 miles. I felt REALLY STUPID both times, so i huffed along. Teri screamed at me to slow down more often than to speed up, except on the hills. It was good to hear that, so now I can adjust the pace alarm settings. LOVE IT!
All in all, it was a great race, and a fun idea. One of the best things was the parking, but one of the worst things was the post race feed and massage tent. I must have been REALLLY slow, because by the time i got back to the start/finish area, it had been cleared out. Nothing there but the tumble weeds. And my nuun.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

just when i thought i was 'safe'....

there have been many times over the past couple of weeks when i have given serious consideration to give up running. for example, the seemingly endless cold darkness here in the VT winter has given me no real safe option for running other than the dreadmill. we won't go into details about my love affair with the rubber band of doom, but suffice to say.....i only tolerated it a handful of times over the winter. not nearly enough time spent on the thing to beconsidered 'training', but just enough so that i didn't suffer any major setbacks.

another example is the internal struggle that i have about devoting time to running. it is a hobby that, on the
outset, only benefits ME. no one else benefits from my runs. or so i thought. to help drive this message home to me, i was given a sticker AND a magnet for Christmas that says, "Running is cheaper than therapy." the take away from that gift is that Dad is a much easier person to live with after he runs. this fact, coupled with my guilty feelings that arise when i do run, make for some very interesting internal dialogs late in the night, and early in the morning. i swear, though, that i am trying to get better with this.
i swear.
in the mean time, i have also thought about not blogging any more. there are only a few people who read it, and fewer people who comment, so it isn't the same as if, say, Redhead or Beth suddenly stopped.
then i looked around my little microcosm and saw that my running and talk of running has (perhaps) had a bit of an influence over others. one of the other RNs in the ICU has signed herself and her husband up for a 5k run  later this month. one of the parents from my wife's daycare has started running, and wants to do some races this summer. another co-worker and i often chide each other about having run or not. my wife, even, has expressed that she wishes that we could run together, but that her ankles can't take it anymore. i contend that if we started back gradually, walking for a few weeks, then walk/jogging, we could be running together by the end of the summer. she's thinking about it. (win!)
i read running blogs like most people read the daily newspaper. reading them has become like crack, and i look forward to keeping up with about 15 people online. i signed up for a virtual 6.66 mile race, and have joined a group of other runners trying to get in 1000 miles during 2010. i am WOEFULLY behind in my distance, but am not ready to give up.

these things, coupled with some recent events at work, have really sent me on a mental downward spiral. i want to publically apologize to my family for my recent bad moods, bad behaviour, and general all around shittyness. i am sorry.
but in the past few days, after some thinking, i have decided to make some changes and stage a come-back of sorts. (can anyone else hear l.l. cool j, "don't call it a comeback, i've been here for years...." no? anyone? Beuller?) and then today, as i was continuing to mull things over, i received an email from one of my best friends. we were chit-chatting back and forth about other things, and it turned to running, and then the comment was made, "Hearing about your runs motivates me...." all i can say is, 'enough said.'

or, as L.L. said, "I'm gonna knock you out!"
Running, you have been warned.

have things like this happened to anyone else, or is it just me? i leave you with some lyrics...
"Mama Said Knock You Out"
[LL]
C'mon man
[News Report]
And with the local DBT news, LL Cool J with a triumphant comeback
[mumbling]
but tonite...
[LL]
Don't call it a comeback
I been here for years
Rockin my peers and puttin suckas in fear
Makin the tears rain down like a MON-soon
Listen to the bass go BOOM
Explosion, overpowerin
Over the competition, I'm towerin
Wreckin shop, when I drop these lyrics that'll make you call the cops
Don't you dare stare, you betta move
Don't ever compare
Me to the rest that'll all get sliced and diced
Competition's payin the price
[Chorus:]
I'm gonna knock you out (HUUUH!!!)
Mama said knock you out (HUUUH!!!)
[REPEAT 4X]

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Sitting on the couch today....

making sure to wiggle around a bit so that my butt doesn't become a permanent part of the furniture, and Tracey said something like, "the weather is nice, but the wind seems to be picking up a bit." So i replied something witty like, "not as windy as I was that time I ate those refried beans....."  "yep."
**some back ground info here. my wife is married to the best conversationalist this side of the Pecos River. I can, and often WILL, talk intelligently with people from all walks of life. and i am incredibly insightful as well. oh, wait a sec. that's not me. that's Patrick Jane. now where was I??? right.
then i said something about not wanting to run in the wind, to which she replied, "i am sure with all that gear you have, you won't even notice the wind."
of course, she is right. but it wasn't the gear that concerned me. it is my amazing ability to run like i am towing a parachute, even in the slightest breeze. add actual WIND to that, and, well, it looks like a scene from a Winnie-the-Pooh story.  except there is no smile on my face. We had the conversation at around 1230, as we were settling in to watch The Young and the Restless. don't judge, lest ye be judged..... I said that I would go running at 1, but didn't actually get out the door until closer to 115. What can i say.... I was really hoping to find out more about the whole Sharon/Ashely/Adam thing. whew. I pried myself away, and drove to a small parking lot less than a mile from the house. i had a 10k loop in mind, and didn't think that i would be able to make it back up the hill to the house after i ran.....
and that proved to be a good idea. i mean, i supposed i could have made it, but would have taken longer than the hour that i intended to be gone. all things being things, the run was a good one. started out headed into the wind and going uphill. that wasn't fun. and then the BIG, steeep hill came. it is almost a quarter mile long. they all seem to be that way lately. this one might be a good candidate for a hill workout hill.
ended up with 6.2 miles in 53:22.

i am finishing this post at work on Saturday. my back is to the window, which is tough for me (Doc Holiday syndrome), but i have to do it because it is so BEAUTIFUL outside, and I am here until 4pm. but THEN i will be outside, shooting hoops with the Fam. i think we'll go to Dothan Brook School.

this weekend, try to get OUTSIDE!~