Saturday, December 15, 2012

My #Wellness List, Numbers 2 and 6

Continuing with the theme I started earlier this week, I'm sitting down in a Burger King (don't judge: cheap coffee and FREE WiFi...) and cranking out this post. Lots of tragic things are happening in our corner of the world today. Some are closer to home than most of you know, but I refuse to let the jackwagons win. I have 7 more things to write about from my list, and it took me a few minutes to think about which ones I wanted to write about tonight. Kinda funny, too, that #3 on the list is "Being Indecisive About What You Want". Needless to say (errm....too late for that now...) I won't be opining on #3.  Today I will delve into 2 and 6, which are "The Shame of Past Failures" and "Your Need to be Right", respectively. Right. (I can't help it. "Who does Number Two work for???!!" ok. done. moving on. As far as past failures go, I certainly have a lot of them. Let's see...I did really poorly at my one and only )Pinewood Derby (Dad built a great car, but I kept rolling it around on the floor, which made it pick up grit that made it slower on the track. whoops), I misplaced tools as a kid, and nearly failed out of high school during my last semester. One could say that none of those things really is a failure, but in my wee little mind they all add up toward the big picture. As an adult I've made some poor decisions that have impacted not just my life but the lives of others as well. I'm getting better at that, but I am still a work in progress. Which I suppose, in its own little way, is a sign that I am doing alright with letting go of past failures. I have difficulty with the words pride and shame. As opposites, it makes sense in my brain that you can't have one without the other. Or at least you probably shouldn't (you=I). I don't feel much in the ways of pride, so I try not to feel shame, either. I feel remorse, for certain, sprinkled with a heavy dose of guilt, but not so much shame. huh... Number SIX is "Your Need to be Right". Do you? Do you need to be right? There are a few out there who would argue long and hard (believe me, i've been involved in some of those) that I (me) have a NEED to be right, and that I believe that MY opinion is the only one that matters. Naturally, I disagree. I mean, I could agree, but then we'd BOTH be wrong. Ummm wait just a tic.... Seriously, though. I don't have a need to be right as much as i have a need to be HEARD. To know that my voice and my opinion matter to someone. Know what I mean? I'm sure there are some of you who know exactly what I am talking about. When I don' think that I matter, I begin to feel (yes, FEEL) that I am invisible. My presence or absence in the room has no bearing on the outcome of events. I might as well be a piece of furniture. I've been feeling that way for far too long, and I'm taking action to help ensure that I don't feel that way much in the future. Seems like Number THREE would be a good place to start next time, no?
Food for thought: what are some things from your past that you are still clinging onto that you should probably let go? Are they anchoring you down, preventing you from reaching your true potential? If so, find a way to let them go. Some people write them down on paper and burn them. (The paper, not the things. Holy Crickey that could get messy.....)  Additionally, do you need to be right, or just heard? To have some sort of validation of your thoughts, moods, fellings? How can your online community or IRL community help you become visible? I encourage you to reach out.

1 comment:

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